Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Sounds kind of like zombie…


 
Halloween is coming.  It is an exceptionally convenient time to be afflicted with a condition that includes toxic, necro and skin in the description.  Toxic Epidermal Necrolysis is the entire title. You can’t tell me that don’t sound an awful lot like z-o-m-b-i-e. I look like I’ve been eating brains :)

I couldn’t have asked for a better time slot to become visibly necro. As my lips grow back they ooze primordial skin cell soup and blood. As all the blisters heal, skin is literally sloughing off of my face and body exposing bloody splotches and pits.

 Among my prescriptions are flourescein sodium eye drops. The drops are this sickly, nuclear-neon yellow substance that instantly transform my eyes into awesome ocular fright machines. My eyes look like they could very well shoot lasers.

The pain meds and steroids amalgamate powers to create a frenzied-trance and detached-daze.  My mouth is always agape and often there is drool and blood because of the numbing mouthwash.

Today I watched Zombieland and 28 days later.  Zombie movies offer an entirely new experience when you bear such a striking resemblance to the undead.  I felt a camaraderie with and compassion for the zombie folk.

I’m in a prime position if this is the year we finally confront an authentic zombie outbreak.  I could act as a diplomat, a liaison for the human community. Or I could fool them into thinking I was one of their own. Zombies don’t have the ability to reason or assemble but I do believe they can be herded. I could be the zombie Moses shepherd and maybe save some humans.            

I’m hesitant to display my illness as a costume. What if some hardcore Halloween enthusiasts see it as the beginning of extreme costume making? Intentionally afflicting themselves with frightening illness and actual wounds for the best costumes…”What are you gonna be this year?”
 “Dunno, I was deciding between parasitic and highly contagious. You?”
“I’m thinking allergic reaction meets smallpox.”
“Nice dude! Way scary.”



No comments:

Post a Comment